Make Peace, Not War!

Hey you!

Have you missed me? I sure have missed you.
I can't believe it's been a month since I last wrote. Things have been pretty hectic. And I feel as though I have lost my creative edge mainly because I take all writing subjects and it feels as though all the words are being forced out of me. I write for pleasure. Not for necessity. I write because I feel words can bring to life what pictures and other things cannot. To be very honest, I don't even know what I want to write today so forgive me if this piece isn't up to the mark.

What IS Victoria's secret?! 

No, I'm just kidding. 

Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?

It's a bit controversial but bear with me,

If you've seen/read The Giver you'll know that it's in black and white for most parts because things like colour, race, religion they create differences. Differences in our day and time are not perceived as a bad thing. But that's just on the surface. What lies underneath is a completely different matter.

Differences cause insecurities. Everyone is aware that there is always someone better than them, with the exception of those extreme narcissists but that doesn't make them any less capable than those around them it just means someone else has a little or a great deal that they can learn from. What scares people is that they are aware of the philosophical take on religion. Since religion is man made and men are part of the physical world in which nothing can be certain-  how can one prove-let alone believe in the existence of God?

It isn't enough for them to believe. They need everybody else to believe with them. But on that note, how do you convince people to believe in something you yourself are not sure of? That's why differences are dangerous. Someone comes along with a completely different view on the subject and that calls into question the source of information. People, as I'm sure you and I both know are not satisfied with the answer of 'The Holy Book' because that itself is man made.

What people fail to remember that all religion is just a way of reaching the end goal- which is God and Heaven. If people do get there using alternate means- a.k.a other religions who are we to judge? As long as they get there. Whatever makes them happy. Whatever they want. It's a choice. As ungrateful as it may sound we can't chose a lot of things but the things we do have control over- I say we keep it that way. It's an individual choice. Don't get me wrong. I firmly believe in God but what I don't believe in is innocent people being killed under his name.

Although I don't completely agree with this, I like John Green's explanation:

"People, I thought, wanted security. They couldn't bear the idea of death being a big black nothing, couldn't bear the thought of their loved ones not existing, and couldn't even imagine themselves not existing. I finally decided that people believed in an afterlife because they couldn't bear not to.” 

But then again Elizabeth Gilbert says;

“I want God to play in my bloodstream the way sunlight amuses itself on the water.”

We can be easily confused by the multiple sources of knowledge we are open to. This just goes to show how incapable we are of making proper judgements and therefore, should NOT make any.

John Lennon takes the words right out of my mouth;

"I believe in God, but not as one thing, not as an old man in the sky. I believe that what people call God is something in all of us. I believe that what Jesus and Mohammed and Buddha and all the rest said was right. It's just that the translations have gone wrong.” 

Be lovers and not haters!

Until next time guys!
XXO,
Sara Malik.© 

The God Complex?

Hey guys!
Ahhhhh it's the third week of Sixth Form and I haven't written anything. I do really apologize it's been crazy didn't expect it to be practically like uni.
It's really overwhelming!

Anyway, by some great coincidence I am studying a poem in my English Literature class which sort of interests me. Do you guys watch Criminal Minds or CSI? It's pretty interesting to see how the behaviour analysts and linguistics team unravel what the unsub(guilty party) is thinking and why he is thinking that way to begin with.

The poem is called Porphyria's Lover by Robert Browning. The English is pretty simple but there are A LOT of subliminal messages in the text so I thought I'd share my view and I'd love to hear yours!

 Porphyria's Lover

by Robert Browning.

The rain set early in to-night,

       The sullen wind was soon awake,

It tore the elm-tops down for spite,

       And did its worst to vex the lake:

       I listened with heart fit to break.

When glided in Porphyria; straight

       She shut the cold out and the storm,

And kneeled and made the cheerless grate

       Blaze up, and all the cottage warm;

       Which done, she rose, and from her form

Withdrew the dripping cloak and shawl,

       And laid her soiled gloves by, untied

Her hat and let the damp hair fall,

       And, last, she sat down by my side

       And called me. When no voice replied,

She put my arm about her waist,

       And made her smooth white shoulder bare,

And all her yellow hair displaced,

       And, stooping, made my cheek lie there,

       And spread, o'er all, her yellow hair,

Murmuring how she loved me — she

       Too weak, for all her heart's endeavour,

To set its struggling passion free

       From pride, and vainer ties dissever,

       And give herself to me for ever.

But passion sometimes would prevail,

       Nor could to-night's gay feast restrain

A sudden thought of one so pale

       For love of her, and all in vain:

       So, she was come through wind and rain.

Be sure I looked up at her eyes

       Happy and proud; at last I knew

Porphyria worshipped me; surprise

       Made my heart swell, and still it grew

       While I debated what to do.

That moment she was mine, mine, fair,

       Perfectly pure and good: I found

A thing to do, and all her hair

       In one long yellow string I wound

       Three times her little throat around,

And strangled her. No pain felt she;

       I am quite sure she felt no pain.

As a shut bud that holds a bee,

       I warily oped her lids: again

       Laughed the blue eyes without a stain.

And I untightened next the tress

       About her neck; her cheek once more

Blushed bright beneath my burning kiss:

       I propped her head up as before,

       Only, this time my shoulder bore

Her head, which droops upon it still:

       The smiling rosy little head,

So glad it has its utmost will,

       That all it scorned at once is fled,

       And I, its love, am gained instead!

Porphyria's love: she guessed not how

       Her darling one wish would be heard.

And thus we sit together now,

       And all night long we have not stirred,

       And yet God has not said a word!

So basically, the author is her lover and he starts off by describing the setting of the poem as a metaphor for his relationship with Porphyria. The entire poem is about how he feels his love is unrequited. She's proud and rich and well...he's not. He knows that she'd go back to her world. The one she thinks she belongs in. And just when she starts showing him she loves him...it consumes him and he kills her. What a transition. From an ill-fated love story to a horrendous tale.

That got to me thinking- what made him do that? Obviously he was desperate to keep her and just when he might have won her over..he killed her? Can we really be so consumed by jealousy and control that we let it take over? Can people really not handle rejection?!

There's something about his speech that gives me goosebumps.. 

 "Her cheek once more

Blushed bright beneath my burning kiss."

He's clearly sadistic isn't he? He thinks he did her a favour and in a way you kind of feel sorry for him..you can see she's driven him to insanity that makes his crime justifiable. And is it really? 

Whenever I faced a difficult situation I remember my Mum telling me that God never puts us in a situation he doesn't think we can handle. But here Browning questions God's presence during his act of betrayal. What the writer has is known as;

The God Complex.

an unshakable belief characterized by consistently inflated feelings of personal ability, privilege, or infallibility. 

I think I've done enough content to fill posts talking about how we shouldn't add to peoples' misery. And surely enough, this is the perfect example. We've already established that humans are a fragile race despite their abilities to set up all kinds of guards and walls that serve as covers. So to drive someone to this sort of mind-frame must take a hell lot of effort. Don't be that someone! A really good teacher taught me that your inner essence is what defines you as you and you are already made up of so many different essences. Do you really want to add another essence to someone's angry and tortured soul?

No? :)

I didn't think so!

I guess what I'm trying to say is it's so easy to feel victimized or victimize for that matter and just like Browning turned the tables on Porphyria you can turn the tables too...and remember not to let the tables turn on YOU!

Until next time,

XXO,

Sara Malik. © 

Back to Grind!

Hey guys!

It's that depressing time of year again where we get back to the grind. All night movie marathons or late night conversations are replaced by 6:00am wake up calls and 8 torturous hours of lessons.

But honestly I'm looking forward to going back to school. Despite the lovely and long deserved break I got I can't be back because I'm going to be in an all new school or pre-college as some might call it.
These 2 years determine which university I'll be going to and that determines where I'm going for the rest of my life. Scary, isn't it?

I found a verse that is really applicable to me and I felt like sharing it because it might help you.

" Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds."

This verse is taken from the Bible from Philippians 4:6-7. It doesn't even matter if you're not a Christian. Or a Muslim. A Buddhist. Hindu. Jewish. Even an atheist. The moral of this verse is not to rush things. If you don't believe in religion then surely you believe in the law of attraction, good things come to you if you believe in good things. It's only a matter of time. As the saying goes;

 "Good things come to those who wait."

You might be starting your year or you might be in the middle of it, whatever it is, all you need is just a little patience.( Yes, I quoted GnR.) 

I don't want to start the year with a long post or tips for that matter because let's face it no amount of advice can prepare you for what may or may not lie ahead of you. It's life. As we've established. It's a bit like a unstable person- it's unpredictable.

But what I would like to share is definitely 4 things and most of them are in the verse above;

1) Be calm and composed. Stressing over something will not contribute to making the situation better. 

2) Be thankful. Joel Osteen puts it this way;

"One of the main reasons that we lose our enthusiasm in life is because we become ungrateful..we let what was once a miracle become common to us. We get so accustomed to its goodness it becomes a routine..” 

3) Make peace your weapon of mass destruction. No I don't mean destroy peoples peace. I mean carry peace with you wherever you go and remain without unnecessary confrontation or conflict. Be a peaceful warrior in every battle you face but DO NOT let people trample all over you.

4) Finally, just be yourself. It's a new year. You get to learn new things and possibly meet new people. It might even be the fresh start you need so look forward to it. I know I am!

So enjoy your new school year, my dear readers!

Have fun and make memories. 

Oh and I might not be able to post as much, although I'm looking at a once or twice a week schedule, if I don't though please forgive me, I'll try my best to keep you all happy.

Summer's over guys!

Until next time,

XXO,

Sara Malik.

Stay Gorgeous XXO.

Hey guys! 

I know I've not been as active but that's because I've been planning something special for y'all! I managed to get hold of a famous local personality! Since I wanted to mix up my style it made it even better that she's a fashion designer and not just any fashion- the fashion that matters the most here in the Middle East! Scarves! So it's with great pleasure that I interviewed Mariam Al-Shaikh, a young and dynamic rising scarf designer in the Middle East!

SW:You're a growing fashion icon in the Middle East! How do you feel about that?

Mariam:It has been an exciting journey to witness my baby "Stay Gorgeous" growing and developing. The experience has been overwhelming so far and I am appreciating every second of it.

SW: What is the driving factor behind Stay Gorgeous?

Mariam:I have mentioned this before and I will keep saying it as long as I'm here; I dream of becoming someone's role model. Not for them to copy me, but to help them shape their own. As long as I can inspire someone with what I'm doing in Stay Gorgeous it will keep going.

       

SW: Do you think people are born with style or is it something they pick up?

Mariam:First we need to identify ourselves with the question "What is style?" I believe that style is not limited to outfits, it is a way of life, it could be our style in studying, our style in doing some work, or our style in communicating with people. Style is more about being who we are. Style is not limited to one thing. Therefore; I think that people are born with style.

     

SW:What does Stay Gorgeous hope to give its fans and customers?

Mariam:Stay Gorgeous is not a complete commercial business. It is set for a cause; to inspire, help, motivate and grow those gorgeous people around us, and I hope that everyone gets the benefit out of it whether it was direct or indirect, young or adult, fashion lover or not, business or charity. We are here to help everyone whenever we can.

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  SW: Do you think there is a difference between "fashion" and "style"?

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Mariam: Yes, there is a huge difference between fashion and style. Fashion is an external relationship; as in what is happening out there in the market? What is trending in stores now days? What is new? From the other hand, style is an internal relationship; "What is happening over here? What is my favorite cut? What colors suit me the most?" Fashion is what is offered to everybody, and style is what you pick from there to fit it in. Fashionable trends could no longer be available, but the way we are stay forever.

 :SWMany girls nowadays are ashamed to wear the traditional clothes that have been worn over time. What do you have to say to them? And how can they improvise on their outfit?

Mariam: Trends and fashion circulate itself; we have been getting trends coming back from the 70's and the 80's. Every old or traditional piece will eventually come back to life, and the fashion history will repeat itself. It is the personal touch and the way the piece is being worn is what makes the difference. The piece could look standard, but what you wear it with and how you accessorize it is what makes the difference. I always recommend ladies to add a scarf to their outfit to upgrade it to another level. It could be a small touch what makes a difference.

SW:What does it take to be in the fashion industry?

Mariam:It takes courage, some people are afraid to try something new, some new colors and shades. I always encourage those who want to take a step forward to break out of their comfort zones because there, is where the magic happens.

 :SWDo you think that clothing really changes the way a person looks?

Mariam: Even though clothing is a strong factor, but I don't recommend people to depend on their clothing to fully represent the way they look, the way a person looks is a mixture of their appearance, personality and their state of mind. Even a smile could represent the way someone looks. I usually recommend people to focus on all of these things to appear their best.

SW: For reasons obvious to human nature not everybody is easy to deal with. So how do you deal with arrogant clients?

Mariam: I haven't been in an incident where I met someone arrogant. I generally try to give every gorgeous lady a good treatment and try to satisfy her whether by styling, giving tips, and recommending scarves on outfits.

 :SWI simply adore your style! Do you think it reflects your personal fashion sense? What do you describe your style as?

Mariam: Thank you! Since high school my fashion sense is the first noticeable factor about me, it reflects a little of my mood; which is bright and colorful most of the time. I describe my style as a mixture of classic and casual, I usually try to add a scarf to upgrade it to outstanding, and of course dress up according to the occasions.

:SW Has the fashion industry made an impact on you as a person? If so, what have you learnt?

Mariam: It made me realize that the way a person looks represents their relationship with themselves. As well as not to make a first impression based on one's appearance, as human beings we usually tend to make a judgment about someone from the way he or she looks, it is true that it tells about the person but it does not reveal who they are completely.

SW:  Unfortunately that's all we have time for today. Can we hope to hear more from you in the future? Maybe a woman's clothing line?

Mariam: Thank you for considering Stay Gorgeous to be featured in your blog as I am updated with your posts. I will keep my relationship with clothes as a stylist, as for designing I will always be a scarf designer.

I hope you guys enjoyed Mariam's interview as much as I enjoyed interviewing her! She's a very determined young woman and an upcoming name in the fashion industry I hope to hear more from her in the near future!

You can find Mariam and the Stay Gorgeous foundation on Instagram!
Or email your orders at staygorgeous.orders@gmail.com
You can also contact Mariam at +97339129591

Until next time,
XXO,
Sara Malik.