Back to Grind!

Hey guys!

It's that depressing time of year again where we get back to the grind. All night movie marathons or late night conversations are replaced by 6:00am wake up calls and 8 torturous hours of lessons.

But honestly I'm looking forward to going back to school. Despite the lovely and long deserved break I got I can't be back because I'm going to be in an all new school or pre-college as some might call it.
These 2 years determine which university I'll be going to and that determines where I'm going for the rest of my life. Scary, isn't it?

I found a verse that is really applicable to me and I felt like sharing it because it might help you.

" Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds."

This verse is taken from the Bible from Philippians 4:6-7. It doesn't even matter if you're not a Christian. Or a Muslim. A Buddhist. Hindu. Jewish. Even an atheist. The moral of this verse is not to rush things. If you don't believe in religion then surely you believe in the law of attraction, good things come to you if you believe in good things. It's only a matter of time. As the saying goes;

 "Good things come to those who wait."

You might be starting your year or you might be in the middle of it, whatever it is, all you need is just a little patience.( Yes, I quoted GnR.) 

I don't want to start the year with a long post or tips for that matter because let's face it no amount of advice can prepare you for what may or may not lie ahead of you. It's life. As we've established. It's a bit like a unstable person- it's unpredictable.

But what I would like to share is definitely 4 things and most of them are in the verse above;

1) Be calm and composed. Stressing over something will not contribute to making the situation better. 

2) Be thankful. Joel Osteen puts it this way;

"One of the main reasons that we lose our enthusiasm in life is because we become ungrateful..we let what was once a miracle become common to us. We get so accustomed to its goodness it becomes a routine..” 

3) Make peace your weapon of mass destruction. No I don't mean destroy peoples peace. I mean carry peace with you wherever you go and remain without unnecessary confrontation or conflict. Be a peaceful warrior in every battle you face but DO NOT let people trample all over you.

4) Finally, just be yourself. It's a new year. You get to learn new things and possibly meet new people. It might even be the fresh start you need so look forward to it. I know I am!

So enjoy your new school year, my dear readers!

Have fun and make memories. 

Oh and I might not be able to post as much, although I'm looking at a once or twice a week schedule, if I don't though please forgive me, I'll try my best to keep you all happy.

Summer's over guys!

Until next time,

XXO,

Sara Malik.

Frustration.

Hey guys.

So I found that many of you were quite interested in the Depression post and I reckon that a follow up wouldn't be so bad.

Let's not talk about depression though. 
Let's talk about 

F-R-U-S-T-R-A-T-I-O-N.

Let me start by saying that the human emotion is both the most fragile and beautiful thing in the world.

We are given the unique opportunity to feel empathy. Love. Pain. Anger. And yes, frustration.

But unlike animals who have God-given instincts in order to survive once an emotion arises, we thirst after the very same thing that is the root cause of our distress or worse- we become the animal Charles Darwin made our ancestors out to be. 

Frustration means that your emotions are a slave to your thoughts and you are a slave to your emotions. I don't believe in emotions as single words because they are not. Frustration is not just simply 'frustration' it is accompanied by 'anger'. Toni Morrison puts it perfectly;

“Anger ... it's a paralyzing emotion ... you can't get anything done. People sort of think it's an interesting, passionate, and igniting feeling — I don't think it's any of that — it's helpless ... it's absence of control — and I need all of my skills, all of the control, all of my powers ... and anger doesn't provide any of that — I have no use for it whatsoever."

The tongue, my dear readers is a sharp double edged sword.

It has the power to both heal and hurt. 

The end result of frustration and anger is only PAIN, PAIN AND OH YEAH, PAIN.

It's like;

I'm falling. 

I'm falling.

Please. Catch me.

No wait, don't. 

In the words of the famous Christina Perri song;
"I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown."

 I'm sitting here and eating my French toast which should be accompanied by a berry juice or something but instead water has taken its place(because my Mother insists on me having clear liquids in my body) and I'm thinking about the root cause of Frustration.

It's honestly simple.

Frustration is a result of trying to keep a law. The human nature is idealistic by default. We want everything to go our way. For people to do what we want them to do. It is trying to do something we simply cannot do. It isn't about not "trying" because as idealists we mould and shape the situation and toy with scenarios then finally when it goes haywire in the slightest we overreact. So what's the solution? To stop expecting? Hoping?

No way.

A person who is frustrated would probably say as Jonathan Safran Foer did;

“I feel too much. That's what's going on.' 'Do you think one can feel too much? Or just feel in the wrong ways?' 'My insides don't match up with my outsides.' 'Do anyone's insides and outsides match up?' 'I don't know. I'm only me.' 'Maybe that's what a person's personality is: the difference between the inside and outside.' 'But it's worse for me.' 'I wonder if everyone thinks it's worse for him.' 'Probably. But it really is worse for me.” 

The solution is to stop trying to be a perfectionist. 
Many people feel like what they're doing is right but you don't and this makes them strive to be perfect and they never reach the mark because whatever they do is never enough so people stop trying.
Discouragement leads to depression, self hatred, rebellion and more.
It is unrealistic to believe you can rid yourself of frustration forever, but you can learn to do things to minimize your frustrations and to make sure you do not engage in unhealthy responses to frustration.
You will need to learn to distinguish between what you hope will happen, what will probably happen, and what actually happened.  Life inevitably has its ups and downs -- its moments of relaxation and times of tension. When you learn to truly accept this reality, you come one step closer to being able to deal with frustration in a healthy way.

There are several types of problems that we encounter in everyday living: those which you know can be solved, those which you are not sure if they can be solved or not, those you know are totally out of your control, and those you are so confused about that you do not even know what the problem is.  You need to be able to accurately assess your abilities to alter situations that prevent you from solving your problems and reaching your goal.  Then you will be able to assess which of the types of problems you have encountered, and you will then be able to develop a realistic plan.

Don't frustrate someone to the point of a meltdown. Constantly stopping to explain oneself may expand into a frustrating burden for the rare individual, so ceasing to do so is like finally dropping the weights and sprinting towards his goals. Those who insincerely misunderstand, who intentionally distort the motives of a pure-intentioned individual, then, no longer have the opportunity to block his path; instead, they are the ones left to stand on the sidelines shouting frustratedly in the wind of his trail.

Everyone deserves to live each day happily and care-free. 
Don't be the block standing in their way.

On a lighter note, Donna Barr says to men;
"Guys always think tears are a sign of weakness. They're a sign of FRUSTRATION. She’s only crying so she won't cut your throat in your sleep. So make nice and be grateful."

Until next time guys!
XXO,
Sara Malik. ©

Bereft.

Helloooooooooooooooo readers. I trust your week has been good and now the weekend is here!
Honestly there isn't much to do but somehow I get by. :)

Lately, I've been feeling bereft, which happens to be the title of a poem written by one of my favourite authors, Robert Frost.

Where had I heard this wind before

Change like this to a deeper roar? 

What would it take my standing there for,

Holding open a restive door,

Looking down hill to a frothy shore? 

Summer was past and the day was past.

Sombre clouds in the west were massed.

Out on the porch's sagging floor,

Leaves got up in a coil and hissed,

Blindly struck at my knee and missed.

Something sinister in the tone

Told me my secret must be known:

Word I was in the house alone

Somehow must have gotten abroad,

Word I was in my life alone,

Word I had no one left but God. 

Source(s): StudyMode/Enote.

The poem describes a night in the life of a lonely man. The title, "Bereft" indicates that he has lost someone, leaving him "…alone" in his life. There is no evidence to suggest that the speaker is either female or male, nor is there any reason to doubt that the poet is the speaker. The speaker is very aware of sounds and movement around him, as one would be if alone. He believes that nature has orchestrated a "sinister… tone", because the secret of his loneliness has been discovered: "…my secret must be known". It seems to the speaker that nature is taking advantage of his solitude and attempting to intimidate him with its "roaring" winds, its "somber clouds" and its "sagging floor". The tone that is created at the beginning of the poem is an almost frightening one, as all the details of the dark night are listed. 

Although the poem is intended  for someone I personally relate it to myself. Being alone opens up ones attention span and thus they are more alert to their surroundings noticing the most trivial things about life. To say I have never completely felt alone would not only be dramatic but false. But grief as it is widely known is followed by wallowing self pity. 

Recently in my Neverland, a 19-year old boy, a fresh graduate and newly licensed driver met with an accident which took his life. Not that I was personally acquainted with the guy but I'd seen him around. He was somebody's son. Somebody's friend. But that's just putting it mildy. Truth be told? He was somebody. He had dreams. He had hopes. He had plans. Things he wanted to do. And he wasn't even given the chance to do that. 

So yeah, I'm feeling bereft and also extremely selfish because here I am with my whole life ahead of me. Or a day for all I know. 

I used to be obsessed with Archie Comics and although when I look back they were just about the constant love triangle between Archie-Betty-Veronica.( Yes, I always rooted for Betty) The only good thing I picked up was "Carpe Diem" which is Latin for "Seize the day". 

If you do the Maths(which I absolutely despise) one day is equivalent to 24 hours. Wow. A lot can happen in a week let alone a day. You can read 2 books. People are born. People die. You get the picture.

Anthony Robbins puts it quite simply; "Live life fully while you're here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You're going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don't try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human."

It is said that you should not worry about tomorrow because tomorrow has its own worries and with this I wholeheartedly agree. If we had all the time in the world human beings would all have the trait of patience but I think somewhere at the back of our minds we realize that time flies and this builds up anxiety and brings out the humanity in us which is desiring more than we can have or achieve.

But nobody ever said our imagination should be limited. After all, we do have opposable thumbs and the ability to think and strategize. We can achieve anything and everything we set our minds to. We need never be hopeless because we can never be irreparably broken. Remember you only lose the game(yes, life IS a game and a dangerous one too!)when you give up. Life's too short to even care at all! Play it smart.

Carpe Diem my dear readers. 

Seize the day. 

You might not get another.

Until next time,

XXO

Sara Malik. ©

Acquiesce.

Ciao my dear readers,

This week has been extremely exhausting and don't bother asking what I did because I myself don't fully recall, but thankfully tomorrow is Thursday which marks the weekend in my little Neverland which is Bahrain.

As usual I was researching all the possible things I could write about when I came across a site with interesting words. The one in particular that stood out to me was:

Acquiesce.

To consent or comply passively or without protest.

I've found that everyone has a dream and often that dream well....remains a dream.  People start out with big dreams and plans and eventually resign themselves to a fate that they believe to be theirs they become content working a regular job and living a regular life. Until one day they stop and look out at their life realizing that it's not what they had always dreamed about. They've gotten stuck in this monotonous, never-changing life that doesn't live up to what they'd hoped. And now in this realization, they start to lose that optimism that kept them going before of being something more.

More simply put- If you've heard the song Pompeii by Bastille you probably never gave much thought to the in depth meaning.

But it goes a little something like this.

Whether it be via large contributions(wars, poverty) or small ones(failed relationships, hopelessness) we inadvertently are the causes of the downfalls in our world. Our vices(greed, lust, wrong doings) are clearly visible in our everyday lives. Our world. Our life. We. Are all incredibly and fatally flawed. We have several hamartia's.  Over and over in anyone's life, there are problems and difficulties. Yet, when we "close our eyes" (stop thinking about the problems themselves), we realize that despite our recognition of these flaws, we really haven't changed our attitudes at all to help make things better ("nothing's changed at all"). For that reason, we keep making the same mistakes over and over again — we've "been here before," and we're making the same mistakes again, one reason why the metaphor of Pompeii and it's destruction is brilliant for this song. We want to change everything that's going wrong, when maybe we should be looking to change ourselves and our own shortcomings. 

One of the most powerful lines of the song conveys this message — "Where do we begin? The rubble or our sins?" In other words, do we just clean up and hide our messes, or do we dig for the root of the problem first? It seems to suggest that the first option will lead to continued failure and an endless cycle of destruction.

When you think about it the answer is right there in the title. 

Clouds rolled over the hills, bringing darkness over Pompeii when Mount Vesuvius erupted. 

The people were caught in their vices and in their daily activities, in poses as the dust of the eruption settled. 

And, perhaps most unsettlingly: 

Does it almost feel like nothing's changed at all? 

Well, of course it would. If a person from Pompeii, in the days when it was alive, visited the place as it is now, with the people frozen in time under the ash, they might almost feel as if nothing were different, when in fact nothing is the same at all. 

It's kind of disturbing when you look at it like that.

When did we start giving in and giving up? 

I doubt that if we were to start our lives over as kids that we would begin viewing them in ruins. There is hope. There is light. There is love. We are just too caught up in what's going on to plan ahead. To tell ourselves that this too shall pass. And it will. We will keep moving forward. We will keep dreaming. Our old dreams will still be dreams that we desire to accomplish. Life goes on and it doesn't wait for anyone.

In the same way we too will go on with our lives building cities from the ashes. 

Don't settle for acquiesce, guys.

DREAM AND ACCOMPLISH!

Until next time,

XXO

Sara Malik.©

                                  

Heroes.

Hello dear readers,

I have been extremely busy and I apologize for not posting. My grandparents have come down for a visit and I have been spending all my time with them. I will try my very best to post more often! :)

"We can be heroes just for one day."

When one talks about a hero they are referring to  a person who is admired for their courage, outstanding achievements or notable qualities and rightly so because this is exactly what they are taught to believe. But despite this notion I strongly disagree.

Like any good writer I had to look up the definition to ensure that I wasn't giving out false information and also for my personal knowledge. As children we're given the impression that heroes are the Princes and people we read about in stories. As we slowly transition into adolescence heroes are those that carry out noble acts like helping an old woman cross the street or standing up to a thief for a stranger and then finally when you reach adulthood heroes are DEAD.

When I looked further into the definition I found that a Hero is someone who is the chief character in a story and this struck me as perfect. A lot of times we are so caught up in other peoples lives and trying to shape and mould ours to be like theirs that we forget about the thing that really matters. OUR life. We're still living after all aren't we?

The real heroes in my opinion are really the people that go through a lot and still keep going. Those that have to willingly forfeit a lot of things in life. Those that don't manipulate their way out of a situation but rather handle it gracefully. Those that eventually accept that it is what it is and carry on with their life smiling. Those are the real heroes. The real hero is YOU. 

Heroism is not about doing heroic things but rather about being yourself. You are the chief character of your story and you can take control of it. I've always been able to convince myself that I am NOT a hero up until now but I realized that ultimately demoralizing myself was the only thing standing in my way.
Heroism is endurance for just one more moment.
And not only I, but everybody out there is enduring something or the other.

More simply put, someone once said that everybody is insane but some people are just better at hiding it.
I don't believe this is true. Everybody is surely insane but it is this insanity that drives them to want to do better. Like Albert Campus once said; "Heroism is accessible. Happiness is more difficult."

I read once in a book called Paper Towns that the human anatomy is made up of strings. The author says the following:

"Here's what's not beautiful about it: from here, you can't see the rust or the cracked paint or whatever, but you can tell what the place really is. You can see how fake it all is. It's not even hard enough to be made out of plastic. It's a paper town. I mean, look at it, Q: look at all those culs-de-sac, those streets that turn in on themselves, all the houses that were built to fall apart. All those paper people living in their paper houses, burning the future to stay warm. All the paper kids drinking beer some bum bought for them at the paper convenience store. Everyone demented with the mania of owning things. All the things paper-thin and paper-frail. And all the people, too. I've lived here for eighteen years and I have never once in my life come across anyone who cares about anything that matters."

It is the exact same thing with heroism. Everything and everyone appears hunky dory but you can feel the urgency in the air. The urgency for the paper to be torn and exposed. In other words, the urgency to be yourself. Not everybody will like it, not everybody will care but it is what most definitely makes you a hero.



As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said; "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." 
You, my dear readers are the true heroes.
Not Robin Hood.
Not Superman.
You. 
Good old you. :) 

On a lighter note, I have been complaining ALL Summer about how I haven't been swimming and yesterday I finally went! Summer sure feels good.

Until next time,
XXO
Sara Malik.©

The 80's > You.

Hello my dear readers! :)

First of all I want to say how happy I am that this blog is progressing! :) 846 views! Wow. I would have never expected this.Thank you! 846 of you somewhere in the world have seen this blog -unless I'm wrong and someone is viewing my blog over and over again in that case it would be creepy haha.

Secondly, I've chosen a very interesting topic which is close to my heart.
So I hope you all enjoy and leave your comments below!

From a very young age I suppose I was exposed to a lot of music and not just any music. The greatest music of all kind and for a long time at school I had people baffled as to who I was listening to and why?
Don't get me wrong, The Jonas Brothers were like total babes(not really) when I was growing up but there was something about the Beatles that just excited me.

So if you haven't already guessed it. I'm going to talk about the 80's.
I'm pretty sure most of you have watched Pitch Perfect(and are obviously anticipating the sequel as much as I am) and if you have, the name The Breakfast Club rings a bell ESPECIALLY the very last scene where Judd Nelson puts his arm in the air and Don't You Forget About Me starts playing.

This particular scene screams the 80's if I were to analyze it. Eh, what the heck? I will.
Okay, so Judd Nelson is wearing this extremely hobo looking jacket and these punk fingerless gloves which give him the complete Stoner look and actually make him look like a modern day Doctor Who when you take a closer look but this of course is my point of view entirely. 
To you, he might look like...well...a hobo. But I personally LOVE the way he's dressed. It's both preppy and punk all at once which brings me to ..

The 80's dressing.

The dressing of the 80's was so LOUD, wild and over the top with no expense spared for big hair, make up and stylish accessories. Hats off to the 80's kids because they managed to pull it off and bring it back once more! Everywhere I go I seem to see the 80's fashion coming back and that brings about a sense of nostalgia.(Despite the fact that I was born in the 90's)

Accomplishments of the 80's.

Well before there was YouTube and streaming there was MTV and before August 1981 there was NO MTV. The 80's saw the revolutionary of MTV and the very first music video played was Video Killed The Radio Star by The Buggles.

McDonalds Chicken McNuggets were introduced to it's menu in 1981 changing the lives of children everywhere in the world!

There were a total of 8 Friday the 13th movies in the decade ensuring at least a few days of sleeplessness during the year.

The drink which gives you wings, Red Bull, was first officially available in 1987 along with the same slogan used till date.

Before the 80's nothing was censored.

The 80's music.

This is my all-time favourite! 

The 80's music was and still continues to be legendary. My personal favourites are the Beatles, Guns N Roses, The Cure and The Police. Not to mention some of the classics like Hall and Oates, Pat Benetar and Duran Duran. 

Don't You Forget About Me- Simple Minds.

Boys Don't Cry- The Cure.

Love Is A Battlefield- Pat Benetar.

Uptown Girl- Billy Joel.

Many people I know don't really like these tunes but they speak to me on a very personal level because they're clean and positive and lively which every good song should be. I absolutely detest the techo-house music they play on the radio these days but to each its own I suppose. Also, songs back then had meaning where as now songs are(as cliche as it is to say) all about Sex, Drugs, Money and Fame.

Things the 80's made.

  Source: nme.com                                                       

1) Mixtapes.

Ugghhhh, CD's ruined everything didn't they?

There was just something about selecting a song, setting up the tape deck and designing the cover of the tape with a personal message for that special someone. Making a playlist just isn't the same, isn't it?

2)Teen Movies.

The 80's saw the rising of the teenage movies. From Pretty in Pink and The Breakfast Club to darker ones like Heathers. All these were resonant and beautifully captured movies about the reality of being a teenager.

3) 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.'

The 80's was the ultimate era of change for girls and women alike. Cyndi Lauper combined cartoons and bubblegum pop gems for her style. It is described as a "strong feminist statement", an "anthem of female solidarity" and a "playful romp celebrating female camaraderie".

4) The Cure

Robert Smith and his smeary lipstick gang filled the 80s with single after single of bizarre,cryptic and urgently wonderful tracks. Their run of game changing songs saw them repeatedly reinventing themselves and what they did.

5) The Smiths.

The Smiths' run of singles from ‘Hand In Glove’ to ‘Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me’ was of one the greatest in popular music. Jangling riffs met intelligent lyrics with psychosexual undertones - the effects were seismic for indie and music in general.

6)Super Mario Bros.

A time before computer games had an insane masochistic learning curve and a metatexual bent? They were happier, simpler times, where two badly drawn wise guys had to run away from dangerous mushrooms and save a princess.

7) Saturday mornings=music 

Waking up and realizing it's a weekend is the best feeling in the world! Back in the 80's they used to bliss out all day to the Chart Show and other music-heavy programs. Best way to relax if you'd ask me.

8) Weird toys.

You know what, maybe toys have always been weird. Maybe not. But the 80s was the decade of the Cabbage Patch Kid. No wonder it was also the decade that birthed Child’s Play with evil toy demon Chucky at the centre of the drama.

9) Saving up to buy an album.

Before we could download the entire history of music at the click of a button, there was a period of time where the goal was to amass £5.49 to get an album on cassette tape that’d you’d been wanting for ages. That was about two months' worth of pocket money. Can you imagine?

10) The revelation of the music industries royal family.

This was the decade when a trio of ridiculously talented musicians (Prince, Michael Jackson and Madonna) ruled pop’s roost. Today we have Rihanna, Lady Gaga and Adele. You can't help but feel something went wrong there. They also invented the moonwalk, power ballads and mullets!

11) Fan clubs.

Before the advent of the internet, the special relationship between fan and artist was harder to bridge. That’s where fan clubs came in. Membership of this elite organization afforded you entry into special newsletters, merchandise and behind the scenes stuff. Following Lady Gaga on Twitter and writing fan fiction is not the same thing.

Well these are all the things I love about the 80's!

Which era do you prefer and why?

Until next time!

XXO,

Sara Malik.©